Thursday, August 30, 2007

What thoughts I have....

If you wanted to know what kind of week I've had all you would need to do is have seen my home. I did not make my bed all week, clothes were everywhere (in my opinion), and many dishes remained in the sink dirty, mind you. And if you know me you would know that I like things around me in order. I wouldn't consider myself annal or obsessive about being neat, but for me as long as my world has some order to it I can handle the stress or overwhelming feeling of not being adequate. But this week it was a long week. By the time I got home everyday after work, and usually after running numerous errands I had no energy to work on keeping my place clean. Today was a long day. I did not want to come home and get my house in order, but I'm going out of town this weekend so I was not about to leave it this way before I left. I like coming home to a clean place. So I took the time to clean and straighten up, and yes unload and reload the dishwasher. How long did this take me, you might ask. Less than an hour, and I even watered my plants, while talking with a friend. So, the point of complaining makes no since. Although I must complain that not sharing the load is at times frustrating but nothing I can do about that at the moment, except for continuing to trust and obey.

There are times that I feel completely scatter brained. And by my ramblings on I'm sure you can tell. I really do love what I do. In many ways I'm learning the art of being a teacher. From watching my coworkers, friends, and my own sister I now realize that I will always be learning that art. Never will one day be the same, nor will I ever truly be able to predict what might occur during that day. And on top of that every hour will be different, every student will be different. The blessings and joys of being a teacher cannot be replaced. The exhaustion is at times surprising. The learning on going. What will it take to master a thing that is always changing? I have no answer, but to keep going, sharing, and never ever stop learning or trying to be or do more than the day before.

Life hardly ever goes the way we plan it to. But I know a God who knows the plans He has for me and I believe Him. "He who promised is faithful." So even though it was a long, hard, and even lonely week. I'm not alone in any of it. Just as I will always be learning about being a teacher, I think I will always be learning about my Jesus, the Holy Spirit, and my heavenly Father. I honestly do not know how people keep moving forward without faith. I wonder at the work God is doing in my life and hope in His promises. He carries my burden when I give it to Him. He is faithful.

My thoughts continue on but I will stop here for tonight. May you not forget how great the small things can be.

2 comments:

becky said...

I love you, Miss Kendra!! I'm going to call you tomorrow... I promise!

becky said...

Hey hey! It's me again. I hope that things are a bit more sane for you, and that you're getting a little bit of rest! I am obviously up way too late... oh well. I'll survive :).

Love you, friend...